"Your online guide to enjoying inner growth, prosperityconsciousness and the infiniterealm of abundance thatsurrounds us in each and every moment."
Published by Dr. Asoka K. Selvarajah
The great teachings unanimously emphasize that all the
peace,
wisdom, and joy in the universe are already within us;
we don't
have to gain, develop, or attain them. We're like a child standing in a beautiful park with his
eyesshut tight.
We don't need to imagine trees, flowers, deer, birds,
and sky; we
merely need to open our eyes and realize what is already
here,
who we really are.
Unknown
Do not meditate - be!
Do not think that you are - be!
Don't think about being - you are!
I sometimes am skeptical about some of the "gospel
truths" beingpreached on the personal growth circuit by many of the
famousteachers. One of them seems to be that negative thoughts
andemotions are "wrong". Well, today's article gives my
thoughts onthis subject.
Several people wrote to tell me that the link I gave
last timefor the free online Mythology book, "God-Idea Of The
Ancients",was invalid. Apologies. Here is a valid one:
If you have been studying personal growth materials for
any
length of time, you have probably heard it said over and
over
again that the name of the game is positive thinking. In
other
words, you must work to reduce and ultimately eliminate
negative
thinking and emotions from your life.
Well, yes. It's a nice idea in theory, but the practical
reality
is something different altogether.
Although it is definitely correct and useful to develop
an
overall optimistic and positive mindset, it may NOT be
helpful to
try to eliminate ALL negative
thinking and emotions from your
life.
Quite simply, to try to do so is rather like trying to
bail out
the ocean from a leaky lifeboat, using just a coffee
mug. The
more you do it, the more there is to do, and the more
hopeless
the task seems to become. From a purely human aspect of
striving,
it is an almost impossible task.
Indeed, the problem with getting too hung up with the
negative
aspects of ourselves is that it can be a very
dispiriting
experience if you are expecting to see positive
improvement, but
it never really happens, or else
you end up backsliding.
Hence, too much focus upon the negative side of your
personality
can be rather like trying to dig the seeds up every day
to see
how they're growing. Ultimately, they won't grow at all.
Why do people have negative emotions and attitudes?
Well, put
simply, it's the human condition, certainly in the
unenlightened
state. This is a BIG subject and one we cannot tackle
here.
Childhood experiences, genetics, influence of peers,
even past
lives (!) - they probably all play a part.
However, what is for sure is that you are very unlikely
to
overcome the matter in the very near future. Certainly,
there are
personal development gurus who claim that you can, and
even give
the impression that they have done so themselves.
However, you
don't know them personally, and you are not there in
every moment
to see if they really have. Maybe their spouse might
tell another
story altogether!
Even the major spiritual traditions emphasize how hard
it really
is to overcome the negative aspects of ourselves.
Christianity
goes as far as to talk about Original Sin, i.e. that we
are
actually totally helpless to effect lasting change on
account of
the fact that we inherited this "sinful" condition at
birth. We
need the heavenly "Salvation" that comes from above, and
which is
effectively a "new birth". However, even this only comes
into
effect in full force when the old body
is shed off and the new
spiritual body taken on. Buddhism
talks about achieving
"Enlightenment", which is an analogous concept, but
which
is tied in more to liberation from ignorance, delusion,
and the
shackles of the Flesh.
Hence, if you think you are going to solve ALL your
personality
issues overnight by listening to a twenty minute
self-hypnosis
tape, or by doing some affirmations... Well, it's
unlikely to
happen.
However, that does not mean to say that personal growth
is a
waste of time. You ARE supposed to accentuate the
positive. Just
don't focus on any perceived lack of progress with the
negative,
or get frustrated with its continued presence. Use
"moving
towards" motivation, i.e. moving TOWARDS what you want,
rather
than "moving away from" motivation, i.e. trying to avoid
and
deny what you do NOT want.
Whatever you focus your mind upon has a tendency to grow
in
power. Hence, focusing on your negativities has a
tendency to
make them stronger. Focus rather upon what you wish to
increase
in your life, and let the negative side of your
personality find
its own place. In other words, make friends
with it a bit, rather
than treat it as an enemy. Regard it rather as you would
an
aching limb. You don't hate it just because it aches!
Statistics show that optimistic people actually have a
lower risk
of heart disease than pessimistic people. Hence, even
from a
purely pragmatic health perspective, it IS better to be
positive
than negative in mental outlook! No doubt about it.
Nevertheless, total liberation
from the negative side of our
personalities does not come without a total spiritual
rebirth.
This is not a matter of a few months or years of toil.
Maybe it
will take countless lifetimes for most people, as the
Buddhists
believe to be the case.
You do well to remember the Eastern perspective of Yin
and Yang
- the teaching that dark and light are inextricably
interwoven
and inseparable in this cosmos. That applies within our
minds
too. To try to separate one from the other, using
standard
psychological tools, is a pretty hopeless task.
Only a new creation, entirely other than this world, can
ever reconciles this paradox and live in harmony with
it. That is
the goal of the spiritual path. So, until then, be easy
on
yourself. Celebrate every advance, but don't let any
apparent
negative personality aspects get you down.
May it be so for you,
.
Copyright Asoka Selvarajah 2005. All Rights Reserved.
Asoka Selvarajah is a writer on personal growth and
spirituality,
and the author of "The 7 Golden Secrets To Knowing Your
Higher
Self". His work helps people achieve their full
potential, deepen their
understanding of mystical truth,
and discover their soul's purpose. Learn more about his work
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